Yesterday my husband Michael and I walked our 10-acre property saying goodbye to many of the beautiful tall pine trees that cover most of it. You see, we made a decision to have our property logged for the health of the forest, fire safety, and to protect our home from trees that could fall on it.
My head absolutely knows that it’s the right thing to do.
But this morning, when a ginormous, scary machine rolled on to our property at 7:00 a.m., I started to panic and second-guess our decision.
OMG! I thought. So many of our beautiful trees are going to be cut down and our property is going to look so different! YIKES! I’m not ready for this!
My heart hurt as I felt the loss of the trees before a single one was cut down.
I love the trees on our property, and have enjoyed watching them grow tall and strong over the 14 years we’ve lived here. Their presence makes me feel protected and safe, somehow buffering the harshness of the world outside our property lines.
Their beauty awes me, especially when their branches are weighted down with freshly fallen snow or when they dance in the breeze.
I love the shade they’ve provided for us and how the deer rest beneath them on hot summer days and find safety in them from the weather on stormy days.
But so many of these trees are now too tall and pose a risk to our safety and our home.
Knowing this should make the process easier, right? Unfortunately, it doesn’t, at least not for me.
While Michael is at peace with it, I’m struggling as I listen to the machines outside cutting the trees down then hearing the big thud they make as they hit the ground, and the rumbling of the huge tractor dragging the trees to our pasture area where another huge, loud machine strips them of their branches and bark before cutting them into smaller pieces.
It’s a violent, disruptive process that shakes the ground, making me feel sick to my stomach and weak in my legs.
So to keep my mind occupied, I decided to write this post about change.
If you’ve read THE SPIRIT FACTOR, you know it’s about creating exponential change in our lives and in the world so we can live to our full potential individually and collectively.
So you might think it’s strange that I find change challenging.
But I’m in no way ashamed to admit that I do. I think it’s completely normal and natural to feel this way, and it is important for all of us to understand this.
I feel too many people in the self-help and personal development worlds have been remiss in covering this point because they’ve sold people on easy and effortless philosophies that promise bliss in every situation, setting them up for disappointment and failure.
But THE SPIRIT FACTOR is different from these philosophies! We will never tell you that change or transformation is easy or that your participation or action is not required.
Make no bones about it, change is hard physically, emotionally, and spiritually, even when it’s good or necessary.
Change is scary, noisy, disruptive, uncomfortable, and also sweaty, snotty, and messy, as I say in our book. In addition, there will be people who will get mad at you for making changes in your life if they feel they will be affected by them.
Even when change has a positive effect on us and our lives, we can still grieve for how things once where or for what we’ve let go of or lost because the energetic shift created by change can leave a tangible void that feels awkward and unfamiliar.
This is why many times we will avoid making changes in our lives at all costs. It’s why so many people stay in unfulfilling jobs or relationships, and so much more.
When I look back at the times I’ve made major changes in my life—ending a 13-year-long abusive relationship, leaving the security of a job I had been at for over a decade to pursue my creative dreams, and when Michael and I sold almost everything we owned and moved from Southern California to our current home in northeastern Washington 1,200 miles away—I remember how scared I felt, how out of control things seemed, and how I desperately longed to feel the comfort of a familiar routine and environment again.
What I tried to remember today, as the energetic shift took place on our property, is that what I’m feeling is only temporary and is just a part of the process of making positive changes in my life.
If you are in the middle of creating change or getting the courage to make changes in your life, I hope you remember this and find strength and courage in knowing it.
I am honored to share this journey with you, fellow traveler, and know that we are on our way to creating better lives for each of us and a better world for all of us.